LOVE OR RESPECT? RESPECT OR LOVE?

Miriam Santiago when asked what she prefers, to be loved or to be respected: “I want to be respected because respect means using the mind, while to be loved means using the heart, which is very unreliable.”

Maraming interpretasyon at kahulugan ang Love at Respect. Merong nagsasabi na pag may love ay may respect at pag may respect ay may love.

Kung dumarating ang isang mataas ang katungkulan, maging sa kompanya, sa gobyerno o saan man, pansinin na lahat ay rumirespeto sa kanya. You call that respect, don’t you? But such respect is phony, sa punto ng mga nangyayari sa ating bansa o saan man,  because behind it there is fear, greed. Marami ang kaya gumagalang, wants something out of the guy, so may naglalagay ng bulaklak, merong yes ng yes, aabutan ng kape, etc. Meron ding dahil natatakot tayo kaya tayo ay gumagalang, baka mawalang ng trabaho, baka makulong o baka masuspinde.  If you really have love in your heart, para sa iyo kahit pa anong katayuan niya, Presidente, Manager, Guro, Katiwala, Katulong o Janitor  you have respect, a feeling for them all, because love does not ask anything in return.

Which goes back sa isang nabasa ko na Men likes to be respected, while Women likes to be loved.

When men receive respect, they respond in love. When women receive love they begin to respect. Nagkakaroon ng malusog na pagsasama. The opposite is also true, halos lahat tayo ay nagrireact imbes na magrespond. Kapag ang isang lalake ay naramdamang di siya iginagalang, ang reaction niya ay nagiging unloving, nagiging mapagsarili at agresibo. Ang babae naman kapag nakaramdam na di sila loved, nagiging disrespectful, nagiging punahin, nagger, at magagalitin.
 
Kaya nga men must give love. Maging expressive, pakinggan ang hinaing ng mga babae, maging a shoulder to cry on, a laughing heart to tell corny jokes. Ang mga women naman ay maging respectful. Give praises, encouragements, ipakitang masaya ka sa piling niya, at higit sa lahat huwag punahin ang mga kakulangan.
Kaya I think si Miriam ay may pusong lalake dahil sa mas gusto niya ang respect.
However,  the respect must be borne out of love. Walang nakatagong agenda.
—000—
 “Oh baby please, give a little respect to me. I’m so in love with you. I’ll be forever blue
That you give me no reason. ” – Erasure

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